#158 Kaila Yu on Fetishization, Feminism, and Memoir as Reckoning

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Kaila Yu

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What does it mean to be fetishized—and how do you turn that gaze back on the culture that created it? In this episode, I am thrilled to chat with writer Kaila Yu, whose bylines include The Los Angeles Times, Rolling Stone, The New York Times, Business Insider, and Condé Nast Traveler.

Before becoming a journalist, Kaila was a model and the lead singer of the all-Asian American female rock band Nylon Pink. Now she’s out with her debut memoir, Fetishized: A Reckoning with Yellow Fever, Feminism, and Beauty (Crown Publishing, Penguin Random House). The book powerfully braids cultural critique with personal story as Kaila explores identity, representation, and the male gaze.

In This Episode 

  • Growing up in the “pornified” 2000s and how it shaped beauty ideals and agency
  • The “ABG” (Asian Baby Girl) aesthetic, model-minority myths, and resisting stereotypes
  • Structuring a memoir-in-essays using cultural archetypes (Geisha, Butterfly, China Doll, “Not Lucy Liu,” etc.)
  • Weaving research (colonial histories, media analysis) into lived experience
  • Gen Z, #MeToo, and why we need cultural reckonings now, not 20 years later
  • Life after entertainment: choosing writing for longevity and self-definition

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  • NEW: Sign up for my free online Editor-on-call NYU event on October 29th Inside Slate: An Unfiltered Conversation with Senior Editor, Rebecca Onion. Register here
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 New Essay:

Read my latest essay on Another Jane Pratt Thing. It Happened to Me: I Deliberately Ruined My Nasty Co-Worker’s Wedding Video.

I loved telling my story all these years later. And don’t miss the episode with Jane #155, where we dished all about Sassy, XoJane and more.

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